Secrets of a Hunter’s Wife


Oh boy, well it isn’t November until the men get all their blaze orange and camo out! My husband is one of the avid hunters in Minnesota and it’s something he absolutely loves to do. He gets as giddy as a school girl when it comes time to get out in the woods, and skips out the door in hopes of bagging a big buck.

So when it comes to us Minnesota housewives, what’s there to know about having these men and their hobby? Welp, quite a bit actually. More so, maybe I should tell you what NOT to do as a hunter’s wife.

Hunting Clothes

Don’t help them out by washing their hunting clothes in your yummy lavender laundry detergent. Apparently they WANT it to smell horrid. You’ll notice how the week before deer opener, you see blaze orange and camo hanging outside in trees, off the deck, or buried in a pile of leaves? It’s to mask the scent of human essentially, so the deer can’t smell them and the scent won’t give them away. So, no lavender, as much as we enjoy it, the men won’t.

Shop For Food Stash

Before their big trip to the woods, take a trip of your own to the grocery store. They will be grabbing everything in sight to bring with them and you’ll be left with minimal supplies. Cookies? Don’t mind if I do! Oh and your chocolate? You can be certain they will pocket that as well. So instead of getting picked clean, go out and make a special trip for them. Pack things like trail mix, fresh baked cookies, sandwich meat, bread, fresh fruit (apples, bananas, oranges) and some chips or crackers. Don’t forget they’ll want some coffee, water and soda to bring along too. (I know, right? If you give a mouse a cookie…)

Don’t Expect Communication

Guys get in the zone when they’re hunting. It’s their time with mother nature, and they often times don’t check their phones, let alone email. Don’t expect to hear from them too often, most of the time they won’t even have service if they’re sitting out in a tree stand or on the ground in a blind somewhere. If you have kids who want to hear from Dad, set up a certain time like lunch time or before bedtime that Dad will call. Sometimes if they know what to expect, it makes it a little easier to have him gone.

Prepare for a Homecoming Mess

You can bet that when they come strolling in the door after a hunting trip that they will have a mess coming with them. Most of the time, you can smell them coming in the door (not really, but you’d think it’d be the case.) If you want to keep that to a minimum, leave him a little area to put all his stuff when he comes home. What I do from here is help him lug it all in and then continue downstairs with his stuff so it’s out of the way. Out of sight, out of mind. Otherwise it will sit in front of the door for the next week. Oye.

Oh and last but not least…

Shield Your Eyes

If you have a weak stomach, be sure that you don’t get anywhere near anything that he brought home. Much like a cat, they’ll be very proud of their kill – but that doesn’t mean it’ll be pretty. Prepare yourself for an unsightly scene, as long as you’re expecting it, maybe it’ll be a little easier on your stomach. Hey, don’t say I didn’t warn you!


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